Growing C's

Project Simplify

2012-02-15T21:07:00.000-06:00

Life has been moving along and I've been feeling rushed, overwhelmed, underwhelmed and myriad of other feelings. But I've noticed my need to be organized is ever so prominent these days so I was happy to see Project Simplify coming up. It's the perfect thing to indulge my cleaning and organinzation side.

Won't you join us?

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Second Guesses

2012-02-09T12:14:00.000-06:00

Last week I applied for a new job within the company and immediately received a call from the boss letting me know that I was in the running and would be up for an interview after the competition closes. Well, that's next week and I'm already second guessing even going to the interview.

The job is awesome. I mean if I think about, without going back to school for a new career, this new company job is my dream job. But it requires travel some weeks. Some weeks I wouldn't leave the city or would be within an hour of home and other weeks I would be gone 4 or 5 days and that scares me. I really don't want to miss out on the kids growing up. I feel that the first week or two of travel would be alright but if I had to do a few weeks a month (like I will be close to election time) then I would get tired of the job and just feel guilty about leaving the kids at home. Adding to this feeling is knowing that Brendan will not be giving up his coaching time away to stay with our children so that I can pursue something for me. Hasn't even offered to stay home if I have to be away when he is. All he says is "we'll work it out." Grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr!

If I'm still feeling this way after the weekend then I think I will back out of the competition.

Weaning and Sleep Training

2012-02-02T21:42:00.000-06:00

The title of the post says it all. This week Kennedy and I are taking on weaning and sleep training and it is absolutely no fun. At ALL....for either of us.

She has refused to go to sleep without nursing for quite some time now and I've let it go on because it was easy. Now I'm facing mat leave ending in a little over a month and we have to wean and she's still waking up at night, mostly because she doesn't know how to put herself to sleep.

I'm not sure how to go about this any other way. Once Emmett figured out how to use a sippy cup he was pretty much finished with nursing the very next day. Kennedy has been able to drink for awhile now. If she wants to nurse and I try to show her the sippy she spits it out. So frustrating because if she doesn't want to nurse or go to bed she'll drink an entire cup. Grrrr. Deep Breath in and out. This will pay off.

So the battle continues.....tips?

Applied

2012-02-01T11:51:00.000-06:00

So a few weeks ago I saw a job posting from my company that I thought I could do and do well. The draw back....involves travel.

I kept seeing this posting adn kept thinking about it and last night I just applied. Just applied. Then this morning I get a wonderful call saying that I will be considered as an applicant and will hear more after the posting closes on Feb. 15.

What was I thinking? I'm terrified to not be hired and really terrified to be hired. It's a job I could excel in but at certain times of the year it will involve 4 - 5 days on the road and relocating the family to a new city. That's a lot to process.

For now I am thrilled to be considered as a candidate and will be happy with knowing my company has confidence in me and worry about the travel and move later if it is indeed something I need to worry about.

Cheers to taking chances!

Hockey Star

2012-01-29T18:56:00.000-06:00

Little things

2012-01-28T15:48:00.000-06:00

In this time of uncertainty I'm still trying to take care of my well being. I have slacked with the eating well but I have kept up with working out - for the most part. I'm also putting taking care of myself by making sure I have enough time to fix my hair and make up every day. That may sound vain to some but it really is amazing how much I had let myself go in that department after having kids. I think I just got lazy which is not good for the self esteem.

After getting 2 kids ready, chasing a dog and doing dishes ...blah blah blah, I just didn't make time for me. Time to dry my hair or straighten it, time to brush my teeth and put on a little blush. Well, no more. And even it's a little vain, I'm finding huge pay offs to my self esteem in my vanity indulgence.

Tials of Life

2012-01-24T12:17:00.000-06:00

It's been a long time away from the computer. Partly because my wireless connection has been acting up, a little bit because my bb broke the other day but mostly because life has been hard, really hard lately.

I can't go into details because I'm so annoyed and frustrated with the situation that I know I won't give it clear or fair representation. But a darkness has crept over me due to it and I don't know how to shake it without making a huge, giant change. A change that is scary and has me questioning all my life choices and decisions to come but it's almost like I feel I have to do it in order to even be a little bit in control of my life and the kids life and even just to feel happy again.

It's so confusing for me and it's a struggle and I'm not quite sure where to look to or how to see the life lessons that I should be learning.

So the blog will suffer for a bit while I struggle through.

Aha Moment

2012-01-13T21:55:00.000-06:00

I had an aha moment on last night. We're getting back on schedule here at our house and that means I'll be handling bedtimes alone 2 maybe 3 times a week now. ugh.....Neither of the kiddos like bedtime and we've been so slack with them over the holidays.

But last night I said enough is enough. They are both sick (confirmed croup with the doc today), I'm tired and wanting some down time so rolled up my sleeves and started bedtime almost 90 min earlier than usual.

7:50 - Emmett and Daddy lie down
8:10 - Daddy goes to coach, Emmett gets up saying he has a dirty diaper
8:30 - Emmett lies down, while Mommy sits on the bed while feeding Kennedy
9:02 - Both kids asleep and Mommy on the couch enjoying her new favorite show The Firm.

So tonight we tried the same thing and by 8:38 Mommy and Daddy were relaxing alone. We've had a few set backs tonight, both kids woke up around 9 but they are both back in bed now and I'm enjoying night time again.

I'm slowly working up the courage to let them fall asleep by themselves......soon though soon

Laziness

2012-01-12T21:33:00.000-06:00

If I'm being honest with myself, and I'm trying to be lately, then I have been unhappy for awhile now. Lots of factors leading into the unhappiness and lots of places to place the blame but I've always had the power to change the situations.

Taking a good look at who I am is one of my 2012 goals or resolution if you must catagorize it. I'd like to get to me and focus on building a more aware and happier self.

One factor leading to my unhappiness is how lazy in life I've gotten. Lazy in housework, lazy in my careers, lazy in living.....just lazy. Now partly it's because I'm tired and feel when I have a few moments to myself I should be sleeping or lounging. Not true!

I used to be so active, so disciplined and so dedicated to anything I did. I'm desperately trying to get back to that.

The first 2 weeks of this goal have been a struggle and I have definitely slacked on off it. But with family visiting and sick children I'm ok with this. Monday I made the commitment to start battling the lazy lifestyle. Baby steps at first for sure but all steps in the right direction. First baby step.....Jillian Michaels Ripped in 30 work out. Whew, can I say I didn't think I was that out of shape. Three days into this workout regime and I feel like today was my first good workout. Today I took away that good workout rush instead of the lazy body feeling sick after work out. I really enjoy the time alone and knowing that I'm working towards a better me. I feel better during the day and sleep better....if only the kids would sleep better as well.

So here's to kicking laziness in the butt, starting with a workout and slowly working towards being more present in my own life.

2 Months left

2012-01-10T10:04:00.000-06:00

I have a grand total of 2 months left on my mat leave. I can't believe it's been a year already, how is it possible that Kennedy is almost 1?

Didn't this just happen?

It's been a full year as a mom of 2 kids and when Kennedy hit the 9 month stage is when I feel I started to really get the hang of this parenting multiple children thing. For those first few months I thought I might lose my mind some days. But once I learned how to let go and laugh at situtations things got better. I'm still working on balancing the 2 kids and have forced Brendan into helping a lot more than before....which is a good thing because I had been getting really angry taking care of the kids and the house while he facebooked.

A big part of me is ready to go back to work. Mostly because work hours will be my break time and the real work will start when I get home. But there is this huge part of me that is most definitely not ready to go back. I love being at home, without a schedule, love being home if the kids get sick knowing they can just stay home, I love finding new things in the city to take the kids to, love walks with the other neighborhood moms and I love not worrying about the stresses of work.

I'm also not excited to go back to work because I no longer love my job and work now feels like work. ugh! I haven't felt this annoyed with a job since college. I feel a little under valued and under appreciated at work and people only call their mlas to complain and I'm just not up to being yelled at by random strangers again.

But for now I'll enjoy my time off and not think about what's coming in the middle of March.

Wordless Wednesday - Together

2012-01-04T12:40:00.000-06:00

Sleep Training?

2012-01-01T10:04:00.000-06:00

Ok moms I need help.

Both of my kids need help sleeping, which probably means I need to do a bit of that dreaded thing called Sleep Training. Yuck! This mommy is not looking forward to it at all and would welcome any bit of advice.

Kennedy refuses to sleep unless nursed to sleep....big problem. I admit this is my fault. I took the easy way out for putting her to sleep. A lot of nights it was just me with the kids and we still need to lie down with Emmett to get him to bed so I would just nurse her to sleep while I sat on the bed with him. Bad habit. But now how to break it? This needs to happen soon because I'm back at work in a few weeks.

And getting Emmett to bed can be a battle. If we aren't cuddling with him as he falls asleep he's screaming. He has enough will power to scream for a long time....boy is stubborn!

So how do we get him to sleep on his own?

Any books in particular or other blog posts that have helped you out?

Resolutions

2011-12-31T14:56:00.000-06:00

I have never been one to really make new year's resolutions but this year there are a few key things I'd like to try and stick too...so I guess we can call them New Year's Resolutions

1 - Be healthier; not just lose weight but be healthier in general so I feel better. That means less junk food, less coffee (sad), dedicating 20 - 30 min a day for physical fitness and 20 - 30 min of "me time"

2 - Be more positive - in all aspects of life, parenting, marriage, friendships and work. Instead of saying I can't, or I don't want to I'm going to say I'll try or yes, it's worth a shot. This may bring on a few extra headaches in the beginning but I think they will all pay off.

3 - Be finanically fiscal. Hubby and I are going to come together on our money and write in all down in an accounting book and dedicate an actual amount to saving. First time Ever for us sharing the financial burdens of life. Surprisingly I'm excited about this. I think it will really bring us closer together.

What are some of your Resolutions?

Other

Bunnyhugs

2011-12-29T15:00:00.000-06:00

We call these Bunnyhugs in our city.....what do you call them?

Merry Christmas

2011-12-25T12:44:00.000-06:00

Merry Christmas Everyone!

Santa brough Emmett a Hockey Stick, presents he can eat and a few other goodies. He brought Kennedy a sippy cup and 7 new teeth. ;)

I hope everyone has a wonderful holiday with their loved ones. Off to get ready for Grandma's Christmas.

Love'
Kalle

Busy Season

2011-12-20T11:50:00.000-06:00

I love Christmas season. LOve it!!! We have been busy non stop with visiting, parties, local Christmas activites, cleaning decorating so so fun. I'm a little sad that it's coming up so fast this Sunday already. Wow. But all is not lost because Brendan's parents and Taiya will be out on the 2nd for a visit and a mini Christmas with them.

We tried keeping small gifts under the tree but they lasted all of one night. Emmett just can't keep his little hands to himself. ;)

I'm so excited to see his little face light up when he comes into the living room Sunday morning. What a magical season.

Tonight Emmett and I are off to the library for a craft, the Christmas story and bedtime snack. He has been talking about it for days. Every Tuesday evening when Brendan coaches I pack the kids up and head to the library for the story time program. I am so grateful our libraries run such great free programs for families. Tonight will be special because it's an outing just for Emmett and I.

We only have 2 maybe 3 Christmas parties left. Oh and I haven't done any shopping. ooops. ;) Brendan has been out and bought most of Emmett's gifts (hockey related) but I've yet to get out there. I'm not worried though. I think tomorrow after babytalk Kennedy and I will head out for some girl time. I know exactly what I want to get and where to get it. Nothing is out of the ordinary and it should all be in stock. And if it's not then I'll adjust ;)

This season I really feel that for me Christmas is all about the giving, spending time with family and friends and just enjoying the season. I can't think of anything I really want. I would prefer if people would give me a few things I use all the time....K cups (love my coffee and hot drinks but man are those little cups expensive), make up (specific to me), some great shampoo. Things like that. I'm not up for clothes because I still want to lose some baby weight and tone my body.

So cheers with hot chocolate (with a splash of Eggnog) and I'm off to enjoy the days of Christmas.

Wordless Wednesday - Jump

2011-12-14T10:55:00.000-06:00

Quiet

2011-12-14T10:43:00.000-06:00

It's quiet in the house for the first time in weeks. Poor Kennedy (and I) have been battling teething. Ugh! 3 teeth all at once has made for not very fun nights.

I'm exhausted with getting up many times with Kennedy, the odd time with Emmett and Wickett. When she naps in the day I would love to say that I power through my emails, clean the house, do the laundry and blog and all that but in all honesty most times all I can do is lie on the couch and hope for a little bit of shut eye.

One Christmas present is bought. Yep, one down and lots to go. I watched Brendan buy one of the presents I was going to give him. That hurts. I truly believe there should be a rule....no buying yoursel gifts this close to Christmas. That just irks me. Now what to get him?

It's been 10 quiet minutes and I'm hoping for another 60 or 70 more. ;)

Side by Side

2011-12-12T11:33:00.000-06:00

Sometimes she loves it.....

and sometimes she doesn't

2011-12-07T12:58:00.000-06:00

It's hard to believe that just 2 short months ago Emmett wouldn't give up his soother for anything. Not a candy bribe, a toy bribe or just go a day without it.

Now we are a full fledged non soother house! It's amazing the difference in attitudes, speech and general noisiness of his life now. He and Brendan had a boys trip in October to BC and on that trip the last soother broke and Daddy didn't replace it. We had a few whiny nights but in general it was a smooth transition.

Emmett will walk through a store and look at soothers, maybe ask for or point it out but he knows he no longer needs them. He will be the first to tell you.

I see him growing every day. We have had a long hard spell with bullying (he's the bully) and not being as gentle with our hands, feet and mouth as we should but I can finally see the light at the end of the tunnel. I think it took him a little longer to realize that Kennedy is here to stay and while he does love her there is definitely a lot of jealousy issues. I'm trying my best to show them the same amount of time and love but it is tricky. Especially since I'm still nursing.

But all so worth it.

Cheers to growing up and all the joys each stage brings.

These Days

2011-12-06T14:22:00.000-06:00

With the election over I'm back to spending days at home and really loving it. I'm still feeling lost and have that sense that something is missing from my life. I just can't pin point the problem to make it better.

It's Christmas season and I couldn't be happier. I love this season. Christmas cards to make and give away, cookies to bake, parties to throw and atttend. So fun.

Plus this year Emmett is starting to understand the season and has really loved signing carols, learing about giving and Jesus' birthday. It's been a lot of fun and it's just started.

Putting the angle on.

Feel Better

2011-12-02T15:12:00.000-06:00

A few weeks ago poor Emmett had a really long weekend of being ill. He was running a temperature for 3 days off and on, ear ache, tummy ache,....you name it. All he wanted to do was cuddle or sit on the couch.

I'm so lucky to have children who really do love eachother. All Kennedy wanted to do was hold his hand.

Sleigh Ride

2011-12-01T11:51:00.000-06:00

Last year Emmett loved going for sleigh rides and this year he is loving pulling his little sister in the sleigh. My how a year can change things.

Wanting

2011-11-29T11:16:00.000-06:00

I have been feeling a void in my life for awhile now and I'm not sure how to fill it. I feel like I am always wanting. Not wanting material things but wanting a larger family, stronger relationships with various people. Wanting clarity on issues that are troubling me. Wanting peace and contentment in my life. Just plain wanting more.

I know I am incredibly blessed with my children and family, a roof over my head, support teams everywhere I turn but I still have this longing.

Something is missing and I'm desperate to figure out how to fill it.

No break yet

2011-11-22T16:54:00.000-06:00

Here I had this great idea of slowing things down after the election. Ha, that was a funny dream. Things have slowed down a bit but I'm still doing election clean up (should be done this weekend), my mom is not doing great and just let us know she scheduled for 2 major surgeries, I'm thinking about the d-word and Emmett threw my beloved laptop on the weekend and the screen is busted so all of my saved pictures and hard drive info must wait until my brother has time to salvage it.

Emmett also had a +40 fever for 2 days straight, Kennedy was immunized yesterday and is beyond clingy and unhappy today and I'm just tired.

:( Hopefully things will ease up next week.

Christmas Specials

2011-11-15T13:22:00.000-06:00

I'm offering gift and free shipping to anyone who hosts a lia sophia party with me in November and December.

Ways to host:

On line Party
Book Party
or
In Home party (for those in SK)

email me at growingcs@gmail.com
or leave a comment for details and have your name entered for a necklace giveaway

Surfacing

2011-11-14T11:41:00.000-06:00

Whew! What a month it has been. I've had a few moments of down time and could have posted but in all honesty after dealing with election things every day at the end of the day the last thing I wanted to do was sit at my computer and post. I haven't even been checking my favorite blogs.

But I turn over the office keys tomorrow and will be able to really sit down again and breathe. Life will go back to normal...well, normal for us.

Along with the election, which went in our favor and I still have a job to go back to after mat leave -always a good thing, we're moving our office, changing the lady who is covering my mat leave, Kennedy is walking along furniture, Emmett only wants to swim and has a very big opinion about Everything and I am have many many ah ha moments and am working on making myself feel better.

I have a month worth of photos and stories to share and will get to that later this afternoon or tomorrow morning.

It feels good to get back to doing the things I love. Blogging, the gym, quiet time, and just regular ole day to day things.

Another thing that is making me happy is Christmas. I love Christmas and yes, Americans have to get through Thanksgiving first, but here in Canada it is Christmas in full swing. We got out the tree yesterday (I think we need a new one) and I'm playing Christmas music and waiting for the Christmas specials to come on TV.

Can't wait to be back to me.

Work Work Work

2011-10-18T23:00:00.000-06:00

The campaign trail is going well. I love this part of my job, it's different every day, tons of busyness, awesome people to be around and I feel like I'm actually contributing to things. It's been great.

Brendan and Emmett are off to BC for the week so it's just Kennedy and I. Tonight is the first night alone and I'm loving having some me time. Tomorrow I will clean but tonight......I had a bath, played with Kennedy, watched all the shows I wanted and read a bit. It was great!!!

Kennedy meets the Premier

2011-10-12T21:26:00.000-06:00

Busy

2011-10-05T00:09:00.000-06:00

November 7 is no longer far away and one day soon an election will be called and for me that means a lot of work. Great work, important work but you can pretty much count on me being MIA from the blogsphere until Nov. 8.

I'm hoping to post at least a picture or 2 once a week but absolutely no promises.

Emmett and his well loved soother. Gah, any tips on how to lose the soother?

Look at those cheeks! She's still so little but filing out more and more each day.

But for now here a few good pictures of the kids.

Let Sleeping Dogs Lie

2011-10-01T14:48:00.000-06:00

Fall Fashion Day 5

2011-09-28T14:05:00.000-06:00

Dress - Lululemon
Sweater - Lululemon
Necklace - lia sophia

I promise to clean my mirror for you all tomorrow. ;)

Fall Fashion - Day 4

2011-09-27T21:56:00.000-06:00

Totally Boring Tuesday ;) And yes, my mirror really is that dirty. ;)

Tank - Old Navy

Skinny Jeans - Old Navy

Necklace - lia sophia

Every Now andThen

2011-09-22T15:46:00.000-06:00

I can brag about pictures I take. As a very amateur photographer I'm always pleasantly surprised and over joyed when a photo works out.

The other day I was not disappointed....

Of Course having a beautiful 6 month old model helps. ;)

What I need to work on now is editing.

Don't Forget Your Fashion

2011-09-21T12:18:00.000-06:00

Quick Reminder

Good Eaters

2011-09-20T09:10:00.000-06:00

Kennedy hit six months last week and so we've been trying some new foods.....and for the most part she loves it! So far she's had baby cereal and homemade applesauce. She could take or leave the cereal but really likes applesauce and sucking on veggies and apple slices.

Even Emmett got in on the action. Showing Kennedy that baby cereal is OK

Look at that grin.
Such good Eaters in the house.!

Loving This

2011-09-19T10:33:00.000-06:00

I am Loving these photos today.

Yesterday started early because Brendan was up to drive to a meeting, and the alarm clock woke Emmett up, of course. Then it was just the kids and I for the day, which is always busy. Then Brendan was back for supper with us and my family (every Sunday is family dinner), then enter over excited Emmett for 2 hours, prep for my Sunday evening meetings, 2.5 hour meeting, home ( 10:30pm), all of a sudden non-sleeping cranky baby. Finally get her down at 11:30 then about 15 min later she was up throwing up her dinner. Ewww! Now ultra cranky baby and mom. Kennedy was all of a sudden really stuffy (and still is) and won't go back down. Finally passes out in our bad around 2 am, sleeps off and on until 5:30, up to eat, back down at 6, Emmett up at 6:30 for the day. Kennedy slept from 8:30 am till about 9:30 and is now up stuffy as can be and shooting green slime every time she sneezes.

Mama is tired! Starbucks....Yes, please

Strong Willed

2011-09-16T10:58:00.001-06:00

Emmett's personality is really developing. It's so fun to watch him carry on conversations with Kennedy, his toys and with us. So fun.

What isn't fun is his new need to say No to every thing. If he doesn't want it or isn't interested he lets you know. Or he'll just ignore you - walk around like you aren't even in the room. Gah! Kids.

But after an hour of saying "don't want to nap" this is what happens while playing lego

Quick Update and some Pictures

2011-09-15T10:47:00.000-06:00

Again, I've been a bad blogger....but it's because I have something else on my mind. Something big, so big that I can't talk about it until I've made up my mind or at least have a bit more direction on the decisions ahead.

But in the mean time, Kennedy is crawling up a storm. She's always on the move. We have to keep our house extra clean because she puts EVERYTHING into her mouth. EVERYTHING!!!!! I spend most of my day chasing her and taking things away from her. But it's fun.

She and I are in the office every morning now. In October I'll be in the office full time and she'll be with friends and family. I love being back in the grown up world but am so happy it's just for a month (election time) because I already miss being at home.

Emmett is growing like a weed and leaving his toddler days behind him. He's only 2 and a bit but he so determined and sure of himself that he seems older. He's speaking in full sentences, carrying on long conversations with us and his toys (hilarious!!!), he loves climbing, picking Kennedy up and taking Wickett for walks. Oh and sports. Mustn't forget the sports. If the tv is on he's calling out all the different sports he'd like to see and if he's not watching them he's wanting to play them. Pure boy! Awesome.

Cookie Monster

She loves to give herself kisses

Kennedy is loving food. She's not too keen on the cereal but loves rice crakers and sucking on veggies

In the Mornings

2011-09-09T12:16:00.000-06:00

It has taken a few months but Emmett will finally wait until he hears Kennedy cry before marching into her room. When he hears that first cry it "Kennedy awake" and he jumps off the bed or couch runs to her room...."Hi Kennedy!!!" in the cutest baby voice ever and then he crawls in.

Emmett's cheesy grin and Kennedy's not quite awake look

Fall Fashion

2011-09-07T13:20:00.001-06:00

I've had the blogger blah's lately and today Emery posted just the thing to get me motivated to post again.

Yay for fashion.

Won't you join us to?

Real Food Day 3

2011-08-31T15:12:00.000-06:00

It's Day three of real food living and even though we've cheated a little bit we've done really well with only eating "real food".

The only down part is that Emmett and I both have colds. Before kids I don't remember a cold wiping me out so much. But these days any sort of off balance with my body and/or immune system and I shut down. Seriously, if I could sleep for 20 hours a day I think I would.

So far the biggest thing I've noticed about this real food commitment is how full I feel. I hardly snack at all because I'm eating such full filling food. It's great. And when I do feel like snacking I make sure to reach for my pre-cut vegetables or handful of grapes. Once I kick this cold I'm sure the real food diet will feel a thousand times better.

Today is also the first grocery shopping challenge.....hoping that goes well.

The big down side to having a cold...I haven't taken a picture in well over a week. Must use camera tonight!

Healthier Living Day 1

2011-08-29T10:24:00.000-06:00

So here were are Day 1 of our real food and active lifestyle pledge. It's day one and can I say Ugh already? I just finished going through our freezer and pantry and we basically have no food. ;) well, it's not that bad, we have food just not "real food". But that's ok!!!

Brendan and I decided that we're going to adapt the real food pledge to suit us a little more. We are going to buy organic close to home things as much as possible, only buy packaged things with 5 ingredients (6 or 7 is probably ok) but if something doesn't work for us then we'll modify it.

First modification...not going directly to the real food. We are going to use up what we have in our stores now because to not use it is just a waste and we don't have the budget to go out and buy all new organic things. So when we run out we'll then replace it with the better, healthier choice. We're also cutting out fast food - which isn't terrible since we didn't eat it before, just in the past few months we've been relying on it more than need be.

Mostly we're pledging to change our lifestyle to making healthier choices for our family and ourselves and to be more active. I've had a great 5 months after giving birth enjoying all the foods I love but I'm noticing that I'm not getting back my shape like I would like and Brendan is struggling with his weight as well. So here we are.....day 1.

Can I say day 1 any more? The first day is always the hardest right? Haha.

What I am looking forward to.....the end results of course, but I'm excited to try new things and discover new products along the way. Oh and the farmer's market. I love the farmer's market but never go, now I have a reason to.

So here's to Day 1 (raise cup of coffee sweetened by honey).

I Often Forget

2011-08-26T11:22:00.000-06:00

I often forget how blessed I am to have amazing people on my life. Because more times than not people are there for me when I need them. Today I'm fighting a cold and now that I'm showered and awake I'm feeling better but definitely needed a quiet day and Fridays are usually the days Emmett stays home. But because I have awesome people in my life it's a quiet day with just Kennedy and myself.

Mom - who is always a phone call away, showing up randomly with a coffee, buying the kids great things, and specialty groceries for us. Always willing to watch her grandbabies if we need it. Awesome!

Dayhome - I can't even begin to thank her. She is awesome with all the kids. Emmett loves going to her place and always comes home happy healthy and beaming. She'll take him on extra days when something comes up and she'll keep him late if need be. And she is always smiling. Thank you!

Brendan - I forget him the most. Terrible to say but it's the truth. Even though I seem to be going through a rough patch in our marriage ( i'm not sure if he feels the same) he is always there to support me and take the kids if I desperately need a break. I know I don't say Thank You enough and I nag too much but I really am lucky to have him and I need to embrace that feeling more.

Friends and Neighbours- Awesome awesome people! Friends who call to say hi and chat just when I need it. Friends to lean on and have outings in the park with or go for coffee. Neighbours who leave food and kids clothing on the doorstep just because, wonderful neighbourhood kids for our kids to grow and play with.

I am blessed.

Family Challenge

2011-08-25T12:25:00.001-06:00

Brendan and I have been searching and talking about finding a new way of healthier eating for our family. We are just like the majority of others and we rely on pre packaged, quick easy meals and a little fast food. So we've been looking and looking for a lifestyle change and we've come across a few. Lots of our friends are selling Visalus and trying to get us in on it...but we don't have the cash to both do the programs we'd like and really that's not changing the way we cook, it's just substituting.

Then yesterday I was checking my email and right on the yahoo.ca main page was our answer.
www.100daysofrealfood.com

The family pledged to give up processed food and all refined sugars for 100 days. Here at our house we're not ready to make that commitment but we are pledging to try it for 10 days and work up to 100. 100 is the goal because I think even before we hit 100 we'll have changed our lifestyle of eating - which is what we are originally looking for.

I'm planning to start this on Monday...so we'll see how it goes.

WW - Walk in the Park

2011-08-25T12:04:00.000-06:00

Day at the Beach

2011-08-23T15:56:00.000-06:00

With summer winding down, well not this week, but here on the Prairies winter really is just around the corner. So with summer winding down we're taking all opportunities to get out. Sunday we took the day and went out to a lake near us to spend the day. It was awesome.

Brendan was able to go kayaking with a few of the kids he coaches and the kids and I were able to hang on the beach and the water with the other parents. We even took Kennedy for her first canoe ride. Kennedy and I were able to test out our new PDF and get some sun. What a beautiful day.

Blurry - Emmett loving paddling alone

I'm hoping for a few more summer outings but our calendars are getting full. Next weekend I have a meeting out of town so we're packing the whole family and heading to the home of the Riders for Friday/Saturday. I need to be at the meeting and still be able to feed Kennedy b/c she won't take a bottle so Brendan is hanging with the kids and bringing her to me when she's hungry.

Then Sunday we have a birthday party and I have a card making class. Then it's already the long weekend after that and I am *gulp* a single parent for almost 6 days straight. gah! Tips? I can handle a day or so but 6 just seems like a very long time. Brendan is off to a kayaking event that he's trying to get me to bring the kids to but I just think it would be too much. In previous years this site has seen snow in September, rainstorms for the last 2 years and we don't have any shelter to hide in besides our tent. So I have opted to stay here in our home where there are kids to play with, beds to sleep in and a grandma who is only a call away.

But seriously any tips on single parenting?

Summer's End

2011-08-22T10:37:00.000-06:00

We're definitely reaching fall time here. I'm so hoping for a long crisp fall. I love all the seasons but there is just something about fall that I love more than the others.

SD went home Saturday and I think, I know she had a great visit with us. Her mom said she was crying at night, wondering why we don't live closer. It's hard for all of us, especially now that we have kids but our city is right for us. Brendan and I have both been able to find great careers for now and build our home. I've made a personal promise to myself to write and send little things out to SD to help her feel included and to let her see her brother and sister grow.

Right before T left. All the kids modeling their home made tye dye shirts

Getting the Hang of it

2011-08-18T13:31:00.000-06:00

Three weeks later and 2 days to go and I'm finally getting the hang of having SD around. It has been a huge learning and growing process for all of us. And now as we get ready to drive her home on saturday I know we all miss each other.

For the past week I've been trying to go with the flow and focus on doing things sd would like to do. Yes it has meant that I'm up way past my bedtime to finish my campaign work and Kennedy has been a bit ignored but I think SD has appreciated the effort.

Right now we're taking a few minutes to watch hoodwinked too and let Kennedy sleep. When Kennedy wakes we'll head out to the store and pick up a few things for SD to make dinner with, then it's home to make dinner and then tonight I get to put on my grown up clothes and go to a work function.

As great as this learning/growing experience has been I am very much looking forward to my normal life returning on Monday.

How they play. Emmett loves to push her gently and Kennedy just squeals and loves every minute.

Back to School

2011-08-13T12:53:00.000-06:00

Our babies are to young to be going back to school but someone from the family is joining the back to school crowd. And that someone is ME!

Academics has always been very highly valued in our family and I'm shocked, shocked that my parents let me enter a diploma program instead of pushing me into a degree program. But they did and I found my way. I've always been employed and payed ok (because really no one makes money in non profit) but I've always, always yearned for that piece of paper that and lately I've been looking forward to a masters and maybe even a doctorate.

So after a 5 year break from school, 1 mortgage and 2 kids later I am heading back to class. 28 years old and starting from scratch.

Hello University Here I come!

Mystery Guest Party

2011-08-11T09:58:00.000-06:00

Today I'm hosting a Mystery Guest party featuring Jewelry by lia sophia. If you order or book an online show you'll be entered to win all of the hostess benefits from today's show. On average my hostesses receive about $200 in free jewelry.

www.liasophia.ca

This month the special is Buy 1 at full price and get your 2 most expensive pieces at %50. Or buy 2 at full and get 4 pieces at %50.

email me at growingcs@gmail.com if you're interested.

Wordless Wednesday - He love her

2011-08-10T13:33:00.000-06:00

Tween Advice?

2011-08-09T23:15:00.000-06:00

Ok this tween attitude is nearly killing me. By the end of each day all I'm holding my tongue and biting back smart remarks and am quick to snap because the attitude and ungratefulness of the SD is too much for me. Yes, part of it is hormones but in this case I truly believe that a lot of it is choice and just the way she is being raised at home. It's terrible. In the past 3 days we've done almost everything she wanted. I've actually started thinking I was super step mom with all my planning. Sunday we took a canoe ride, had dinner at my mom' and went to a park, Monday I took SD shopping, bought her clothes and out for lunch, today we went to a parade, made popsicles, went through my jewelry and after all of this maybe one thank you. Plus, when she called home and they asked what she had done she says "Nothing much, just watching TV." GRRRRRR. I spend all day and night with this and hubby comes home for the evening and even he's had enough of it. Her mom says it's nothing but hormones. I'd almost be willing to accept that but the attitude never changes. It doesn't get better and it doesn't get worse. All she's concerned about is herself and how much she buy or go do.

Am I in for it with Kennedy? I really hope not and don't think so. If I'm way wrong and all tweens and teens drive their parents this much.....What do You Do?

Any advice on how to survive the next 9 days?

One week down

2011-08-05T13:46:00.000-06:00

So it's been a week and only 2 left to go. for the most part it's been ok. A lot of "what's next?" "Why not" "If not today then tomorrow?" and about a thousand other questions that all relate to "why can't we do what I want?" and they are really starting to get to me. I value/crave NEED my alone time. Not just quiet time - but all alone time and I'm missing that.

But we've had a great time baking cupcakes, scrapbooking, going to parks, and hanging with the little kids. Thank goodness for my mom who came over last night with a list of things she wanted to do with T. Can I just say Mom's ROCK! so today they are off to a movie and they have a few special dates next week. Which will help take the pressure off me.

Next week I'm hosting a mystery guest part for lia sophia jewlery. If you'd like more details on how you could win all the hostess benefits and a chance to win the door prize($130 value) just send me an email to growingcs@gmail.com

Sweet Shot Tuesday

2011-08-02T06:49:00.002-06:00

Kennedy enjoying some naked time while helping me with the laundry. It's so amazing and fun to watch her move. The moment you put her down she's off. Either rolling all around the room or army crawling her way across.

It's busy and I can't even imagine how life will really change once she figures out crawling.

3 Days In ...

2011-08-01T14:20:00.000-06:00

And I may or may not need rescuing from SDs visit already. Luckily we got a few good pictures and at least one good day.

But I didn't splurge on camps and DH sure didn't organize anything for his daughter so I'm left to deal with the attitude during the day for the next few weeks. This tween attitude just might kill me. I've had to walk away 3 times already before I said something I really regretted.

Deep breaths

Summer Lovin

2011-07-31T22:26:00.000-06:00

Quiet

2011-07-28T12:58:00.000-06:00

I'm enjoying my last few hours of peace, cuddling my baby girl, surfing the blogs, facebooking and not talking.

Bliss!!!

SD will be here in less than 3 hours. I hope the next few weeks go fast.

SD for 3 weeks

2011-07-26T10:48:00.000-06:00

It's that time again and even though I've known it's been coming for a few months now I'm still not ready. It's time to put on the step mom hat because T is coming Thursday and staying till the End of August. END OF AUGUST. Do you know how long that is in step parenting terms? Forever that's how long.

I'm also left with the dilemma of what to do with her. I'm home and Brendan didn't arrange for camps which was our plan. But finances came up and he knew I was home (not worried about the breaks I'll need) so he didn't worry about it. So my dilemma is do fork out yet again more money to put her in camps for the sake of my sanity? The answer is pretty much yes. I cherish my alone time and if she was home with me all day every day then I can't say it would be quality time. So from out of my pocket I think I'll get her into camp at least for one or 2 weeks. It's probably the best decision for us all. After all happy wife, happy life. hahah

For those who read and may not be step parents I know that my step parenting ramblings can seem really rather harsh towards this innocent child who can't help the situation we're in but I assure you most step parents go through this at some time or another.

I was flipping through the stations yesterday and saw that Dr. Phil was doing a show on blended family so I stopped and watched. He was the first person I have ever heard say that step parents don't form that bond with the step kids. Thank you for taking the pressure off Dr. Phil. Forming that bond takes work and time absolutely! So nice to finally have someone acknowledge that. I married her dad not her. Yes it was a packaged deal but realistically I did not choose her I accepted her.

Now that her dad and I are on rocky ground accepting her is even harder.

But I can see all the good in her too because she is after all just a child and one that is an awesome big sister.

She is a great little dancer, wonderful skier, has a huge heart and loves being with her friends and family. She's also just graduated from her elementary school and will be starting at a new school in the fall with new friends and new school activities.

So even though it's hard and something I struggle with every day I do see how great she is/ can be.

My new approach is not to look for that bond right now but to strive to form it over time. I'm open to the idea that I may not have that bond or be able to fully love her until she's much older and we can be friends as women, not step family.

Home Again Home Again

2011-07-25T11:04:00.000-06:00

So nice to be home! Emmett is sleeping 12 hours a night, Kennedy is sleeping 8 or 9 and I'm getting to sleep again to.

Home is good.

On the trip Kennedy learned to roll! Rolling at 4 months sure keeps me busy! I'm still waiting for Emmett to really roll. haha. Rolling definitely makes diaper changes tricky. I'm pretty sure she'll be crawling pretty soon.

Colorado Vacation

2011-07-18T13:50:00.000-06:00

Just a few more days of vacation and this Colorado heat. Back to the real world Wednesday evening.

Here We Go...

2011-07-09T20:56:00.000-06:00

So after a very busy few days, laundry is just being done as I type, packing has not even started, Kennedy is sleeping (fingers crossed she stays that way for a bit) and teething, Emmett is with Daddy for a car ride and probably sleeping (poor guy had a long day) and I'm enjoying some coffee while making lists of who's bringing what, what we need and folding laundry.

Tomorrow we are off to Colorado for 11 days...so excited. We're staying with friends so hopefully I'll have time for a few updates while we're holidaying. If not see you when we get back.

6 Days Without Internet

2011-07-05T23:53:00.000-06:00

A total blessing and a curse to have gone 6 days without internet access. I wasn't totally cut off thanks to my blackberry but unless we drove 20 minutes into town there was not any high speed for us. And besides needing it a few times for campaign (work) reasons it was great!

I took a few pictures but of course I left that camera with Brendan and he's not home yet. I braved the 6 hour drive alone with the kids yesterday. Well, not totally alone, I followed another family heading home and had help when we stopped for gas and to nurse Kennedy. ButI must say I feel totally confident that I would survive a trip with the kids alone. The kids were also absolute angels. Emmett slept for a good 4 hours and Kennedy slept for almost 5. Such good kids.

Now it's time for laundry cleaning, mla bbq and re-packing for our big trip to Colorado on Sunday. Whew, I'm tired just thinking about it. But so excited to see Colorado.

WW -There was Cake

2011-06-29T11:25:00.000-06:00

Happy 2nd Birthday Emmett

2011-06-27T14:46:00.000-06:00

New Sweater from Grandma C

Happy Birthday Emmett! I can't believe you're 2 already.

Birthday Picture - 8am (birth time) on June 27, 2011

Thank you so much for bringing so much joy into our lives and every one else you meet. You are a sweet and caring boy. You are a bit of a mama's boy, which can drive me a little nuts some days, I absolutely love that you look for me first and when you need something it's "Mommy" that you're crying out.

You're finally sleeping through the night, for the most part. Every morning between 4 and 6 am you come into mom and dad's room to crawl into bed with us.

You are 2ft and 11inches and weigh 31lbs.

Emmett, I know adjusting to Kennedy has been a big one and we're still working on it somedays but you are an AWESOME big brother. If you get up early and she's still sleeping you make sure to close her door so she can sleep in peace, you like to lie next to her for diaper changes. You smoother her with kisses and love to hold her hand and she cherishes you!

My favorite part of the day is when you tell us "I wuv you." Melts my heart every time.

A few of your favorite toys are your new lawnmower, trucks, soccer basket and footballs. You love, love, love the show Mighty Machines.

You are a wonderful little boy! Your vocabulary astounds me, you say new words and sentences every day. We can have full conversations with you now and that is so fun.

Have a great day!

Dark Days

2011-06-24T11:02:00.000-06:00

I've been having a very hard week - feeling wise. I always try not to blog or email when I'm having a tough time so pardon my absence over the next few days/weeks.

Sometimes I think I'm trying to do too many things but then I sit back and realize that it's not too much, I just need some help...but it's a struggle to get that from where I need it most. End blogging about that aspect of life before I say way too much too the public. Then again maybe it needs to be said to the public because it for sure is not said or heard at home.!!!!

I love being a mom, love being at home but I love the campaign trail and feel like I need/want to do more on it because it's another one of my babies, but it needs to be sacrificed a bit because i'm nursing and well you just can't do that in a room on 5 -7 powerful political male minds, take notes, get quotes and organize the volunteers and whatever else needs to be done. So I do as much as I can when I can and still have managed to maintain my Campaign Manager title. - which to be truthfully honest I value more than I ever could have imagined.

Jewelry is what I'd like to focus on but it just hasn't happened yet....not for lack of trying.

Personal time - I NEED to make time for that. Unnamed partners just take what they need and I need to start doing that because I'm starting to feel resentful towards it. Though in order for me to take personal time I need to hire a babysitter and that's expensive and I'm pretty much done spending money until said unnamed partners get there act together and make an effort to pay back other unnamed partner. Yep pay back! Money is taboo to talk about in the house because well, I don't know. I want to talk about it but it just lands on deaf ears or the slamming of a door. I've held my tongue as long as I can and now my walls are starting to break down. I'm just all around done.

Done with paying for everything, done with scheduling my life around everyone elses, done with being the first to wake and last to sleep ALL the TIME, done with having to coax/beg for help while I'm nursing and can't leave the couch....just done. Exhausted, angry, hurt and insecure.

At 28, almost 29, I think I have finally realized that it is Me time.

WW - Siblings

2011-06-22T20:43:00.002-06:00

Rain Rain,,,

2011-06-21T11:47:00.000-06:00

Our province has had so much rain this past week. Tons of places are flooding, farmers have had to put off or cancel seeding, and Emmett and Wickett are a little housebound

Speaking of Emmett - my little baby is turing 2 on Monday. How did that happen? We have his birthday party on Saturday and I'm so looking forward to it. Emmett has invited all the neighborhood kids over to play and we have a few close family and friends coming over to hang out. Not a big party and very minimal planning on my part. Really we're just taking our regular Saturday activities and adding to them. Usually Emmett and all the kids play at our neighbors 2 doors down and we're just moving the fun to our place for the afternoon and adding cake.

his one year old picture

I'm looking forward to the mellow afternoon.

Travel Tips?

2011-06-17T13:25:00.000-06:00

So we're getting ready to head out for a summer full of traveling and I'm looking for tips for travelling with small kids. Next weekend is Emmett's birthday party (I should probably send out invites) then we're starting our travelling summer with a trip to Alberta (just a quick 5 hour or so) drive away. We've done this drive tons with Emmett when he was young and didn't need a lot of entertainment. Now he's an active, very active, two year old and I have no idea how to keep him entertained for 5 or more hours in a car. If he liked to watch movies that would help but he has pretty much no interest in tv. I may head out to the library/video store to see if they have any dinosaur and truck themed movies for him.

Then after our Canada Day weekend we're taking the big trip.....to Colorado. So excited about this (minus the fact that I'm missing the NKOTBSB show). I can't wait to see Boulder and to meet some of the people Brendan's always talking about.

The Colorado trip is a 2 hour plane ride and who knows how long in custom lines. Any tips for international travel?

Really I think everything will be fine. Just to brag a little...I really am blessed with great kids. Emmett will love looking at the planes and will as a thousand and one questions while waiting in lines. Hopefully travel days will be on days for the kids. We've tried to schedule the big part of travelling during regular day hours so their normal schedule won't be too upset, I've got lots of little books, coloring, new toys and snacks for Emmett but after that I'm clueless.

Any tips would help. What to pack? What not to pack? Keeping them happy....all that good stuff.

These two gorgeous faces wouldn't cause trouble would they?

What Little Boys do...

2011-06-15T08:13:00.000-06:00

When you turn you back

Dress in wicked cool plaid and stripes outfits

Climb Big Boy ladders and give you heart attacks.

Genuinely just steal your hearts!

Backyard Fun

2011-06-13T11:13:00.000-06:00

We're still relatively new house owners (2.5 years and counting) so each season we're still finding regular household things we need. This season it's things to entertain the kids.

Last Summer Emmett was barely 1 and really didn't need much in ways of outside toys. This summer....whole other ball game. From the moment he gets up to the moment he finally falls asleep he is either outside or asking to go outside. I'm so thankful that we have a decent sized backyard and a huge side deck for him to enjoy but empty space just isn't enough this year.

Luckily we have awesome friends....awesome friends who were selling there old playset, but GAVE it to us when they heard we were in the market for set.

And they just trucked it over...no assembly required.

Testing the ladder

Testing going up the slide

And going down the slide

Emmett wasn't a huge fan of the big truck and crane they used to get it over the fence but I think he likes the end result.

Campaign On

2011-06-09T12:09:00.000-06:00

Mat-leave, What's that? haha.

Last time with Emmett on mat-leave I could spend my days lounging, cleaning, feeding.and really doing whatever Emmett and I decided to do that day. So not the case this time.

I ambitiously agreed to stay on as campaign manager for one of the provincial candidates and the election just happens to be a mere 5 months away. 5 months, that's no time at all. That's barely enough time to knock the constituency twice, when ideally we'd like to get through it at least 3 times. Gah. So much to do.

So now instead of hanging out at home and taking it easy and enjoying mat-leave, I am running around on errands, opening up a new office (must be separate from our government office), organizing volunteers, sitting in strategy meetings....etc. All with Kennedy in tow.

Kennedy is such a trooper. She usually just sits up and takes it all in. If by chance there is another woman in the room (politics is definitely a boys club) then Kennedy usually goes to visit her. Every now and then she gets cranky but my team has been really awesome in letting me do most of my work from home.

October - November will be insane. I'm not ready to think that far ahead....too much, but I love campaigning. Whoever thought that I would be into politics? Definitely not me or any one else who knows me but I really really love the strategy meetings, seeing every one come out and get together. And the people are truly amazing.

But it's a lot. Laundry is piling up, Kitchen is a mess, yard work...don't get me started but it will all be worth it on election night. Watching those numbers come in and knowing I had a small role in helping a government official get elected.

WW - Reflections

2011-06-01T08:23:00.000-06:00

Sprinkler fun

2011-05-31T11:17:00.000-06:00

Watermelon Smile

Emmett is definitely a water baby. Ever since he was a little bity baby. There is just something about the water that he loves. I'm hoping this love continues all through his life.

Last week after dinner we had our sprinklers on and Emmett had a blast playing in them. He ran through them once and then enjoyed just getting his hands wet.

Maybe a bit of Overshare

2011-05-30T13:02:00.000-06:00

This post might just border on the edge of oversharing information but it's just so annoying I have to write about it. Really this is just me complaining.

I spent 11 years in dance shoes and running shoes and was lucky enough to never have any foot problems. Since then I've been in and out of gym/running shoes and still haven't had any trouble until a few weeks ago. I haven't been to the gym since I was pregnant with Emmett, I shower every day, wear cotton socks and ventilated shoes and yet somehow, someway I have come in contact with Athlete's foot.

One word: ITCHY!!!!

Seriously this thing is itchy, itchy, itchy! It's only one my left baby toe and gah, I can barely think of anything else. I didn't know what it was until I finally broke down and complained to Brendan. He took one look at it and set me up with some foot cream. 3 days into treatment and it's still itchy. I read the box this morning and it says that athlete's foot can take up to 4 weeks to cure. 4 weeks plus the 2 I already spent trying to ignore it. Gross!

I've been trying to trace where I would have got it from and I'm pretty sure it all leads back to not wearing shower shoes at the pool. Lesson learned.

Just Run out...

2011-05-27T16:55:00.000-06:00

Not venting...well, maybe just a little. :)

I think it's hilarious how husbands, men in general think that because we're at home that we can just run out and pick something up. Do they not understand how much planning it takes to just run out with kids?

First off, even if she is sleeping, I have to wake her, change her, maybe feed her. Then get us both in the car and hope she's content and not annoyed that I woke her.

If she's awake then it's not so bad. Maybe a quick change and a little snack and away we go.

If I have both kids and she's sleeping then pretty much all is lost and a quick "run out to get it" turns into an all out event. mostly because I have to convince Emmett that "running out" is fun and we should definitely leave the fun outdoors to sit in a car and run into a store. Bah,

Honey on your way home, please, please just pick it up. :)

Baby #3?

2011-05-24T09:02:00.000-06:00

No I'm not pregnant and am not looking to be pregnant., right away at least

Kennedy is only 2 months and already growing so much and it's going way too fast. I love being at home, love not having to rush every morning to get to work and get the kids dressed, love being able to keep Emmett home a day here and there, love snuggling on the couch with Kennedy, love love love everything kids and home.

I'm really happy with 2 kids and Brendan is pretty sure our family is complete but my heart yearns for at least one more baby. I would really love to have at least one more babe in 2 or 3 years. 3 has always been my family number but if 4 or 5 came along (if we could handle it financially) then I'm ok with that and if we aren't able to have another then I think I'm almost ok with that too...almost.

I've always loved kids but I didn't know how much I would love being a mother until I became one. If I could give up work and be a full time stay at home mom then I would. Right now I'm thinking about taking at least one more year off after mat leave because financially we"ll be able to do it but I would love to say good bye to work and just work on help the family grow.

Brendan is just saying no more kids but he hasn't asked about any permanent birth control so I think he may be open to the idea of another in a few years...

Mr. Fix It

2011-05-23T16:32:00.000-06:00

Emmett loves to "fix" everything.

And standing in the Kitchen sink just makes it that much easier. ;)

Siblings

2011-05-20T16:42:00.000-06:00

I know eventually they will be bickering and arguing (ever now and then) but I also know that these two (and whoever else joins the party) will always have each other and will one day be the best of friends.

Bedtime Tips

2011-05-19T14:41:00.000-06:00

It is very rare that I'm able to get a sleeping picture of Emmett. He takes after me in the sleep department - light sleeper and needs very little to go all day. Mom - so sorry for your sleepless nights (I'm totally paying for keeping you up back in the day).

Naptime goes really really well. It takes all of 5 minutes for him to fall asleep and then he's out for an hour or a little more and wakes up refreshed and ready for round 2. Bedtime is a whole other story and I can't figure it out. Bedtime used to take about 30 min but now it can take up to 2-3 hours and I just don't know what to do. Why is napttime so simple and peaceful and bedtime horrendous? It's getting to my nerves and taking up way too much of my quiet time, alone time and time for Brendan.

We've tried everything; early bedtime, late bedtime, no naps, early naps, letting him cry it out, cuddles, quiet time, lots of play, warm milk, etc.

I'm lost as to what to do next. Is this a phase or can I correct this as a parent? I know he's tired at night because he walks around rubing his eyes, whining and really not knowing what he wants. When he does go down he sleeps for the whole night and doesn't wake until 7am or 8am the next day. The full nights rest is good but I'd like him to be asleep before 10 at night.

I got this series of pictures this morning after Emmett got up at 6am played for a bit and fell back asleep in our bed with his boots on. So sweet

Guidance please!

WW - Love

2011-05-18T09:18:00.000-06:00

Trial Day Two

2011-05-16T09:20:00.002-06:00

Trial Day Two -
This was the day that our lawyer cross examined my step-mom. I have to say, I was scared for her sometimes. Our lawyer came at her hard and was pretty unforgiving sometimes. Though I think for some of it the step-mom was playing dumb. I don't know if it was case strategy or if she was just having that much difficulty following the questions. Either way the Judge had to pause several times to direct the step mom answer the question and not elaborate. She just rambled on and on.

One thing I wasn't at all prepared for (none of the kids were) was how our lawyer closed her cross exam. Before my Dad passed away he had written the kids a letter - obviously he knew the cancer was terminal and had been thinking about it so he put his thoughts down on paper for the kids. As soon as he passed the step mom told us about the letter, so I asked for it. That was 4.5 years ago. First she couldn't find it, then we weren't mature enough for it, then it was part of the estate and we weren't allowed to have it until everything was settled. Honestly she wouldn't release the letter her husband wrote to HIS kids until a judge ordered her to give it to us 2 years ago. What closure that was to finally read the last things my dad wanted us to know and to read all the things that he didn't get a chance to say. It's a hard read and I have to admit I've only read it once. But as a strategic move (and a good one i think) our lawyer read the letter out loud to the court and failed to tell us she was doing this. Cue 4 grown kids bawling in the court room and the end of Day Two

Watch Them Grow

2011-05-13T13:02:00.000-06:00

I have truly enjoyed every stage Emmett has been through. It's amazing watching children grow. I find it hard to believe that my little boy is almost 2 and that my little girl is 2 months already.

Emmett has been developing in leaps and bounds lately and it has been so fun to be a part of.

His words are coming so fast I can barely keep up. He has started to speak in sentences and often asks for help if he needs it or asks what's happening if he doesn't understand. He calls out the name of everything he recognizes.

He has such a kind heart. His favorite thing to do is to help. If a phone rings he runs over picks it up and brings it over to us "here Mommy or here Daddy" whose ever phone is ringing. If the main phone rings he"ll pick it up and just smile. He hasn't quite got the idea of talking on the phone to another person. Now that the weather is nice all he wants is to be outdoors. "Outside" is quickly becoming his favorite word.

We are so blessed to have him in our lives. He loves his baby sister and would carry her around all day if he could. His loves to hold her hand and give her kisses. He'll even help with diaper changes.

Back to Life

2011-05-10T10:55:00.000-06:00

Just incase Kennedy wakes up here's a quick post. Life is getting back to normal trial is over (just a few months away from a verdict), Emmett is healthy, Kennedy is growing, I'm getting some sleep and Brendan is loving his new job. Spring has sprung and I can say I don't miss winter at all.

Trial Day One

2011-05-02T22:54:00.000-06:00

Trial Day One is over and was fairly uneventful. Life is mellowing out a bit now that I know what real court is like (so not as exciting as TV).

But the blog will be suffering this week because I totally failed at pre-writing posts for this week. Oh well, c'est la vie.

Here's a preview of the photos of Kennedy for our thank yous

Sick Baby

2011-04-28T12:30:00.000-06:00

Our house just can't seem to get healthy. Emmett has another ear infection and poor Kennedy has a cold. Colds in tiny little babies is just awful. She can't breathe and I feel so helpless. Lots of steaming, and cuddling going on here. Any tips for treating colds in newborns?

Fun With the Camera

2011-04-27T12:29:00.000-06:00

I took these photos when Kennedy was just 5 days old. She was so tiny and squishy then.

Then at a month I did it again. Look at how she's changed. It's truly amazing how much growing a baby does in the first few months. Kennedy will be 7 weeks on Thursday and she's still so little but far less fragile.

I love this littleness stage but I am looking forward to her being a little older and more stable. Emmett loves her so much that we can't let them out of our site. When he's home with her and she's napping I have to play hide the baby so he doesn't wake her up by wanting to play or sit at the door screaming for the baby. It's tough some days but I know it's a blessing to see him grow into his role as a big brother. She will be one protected little sister - that's for sure.

First Haircut

2011-04-26T16:29:00.000-06:00

I loved loved Emmett's curls. It took me months to work up the courage to take him to get his haircut. We finally did it this weekend. And I do have to say it looks fantastic. The hairdresser was even able to save some of his curls. My little boy is definitely growing up.

Waiting for his turn. Look at all that hair!

Love this Picture! What a little poser ;)

Driving the jeep

The end result

Game On

2011-04-25T10:17:00.000-06:00

Happy Easter

2011-04-24T16:35:00.000-06:00

Good thing Emmett and Kennedy are so young because I sure did forget to fill the Easter baskets last night. Oops! ;) Between Emmett's third ear infection in 6 weeks, Kennedy's cold and trouble breathing,
Brendan getting sick again and all the house work I have and my general need for a break Easter night just caught me off guard.

But the bunny will make the rounds tonight. I had everything it's just the matter of remembering to put it out. Haha.

Happy Easter Everyone!

Tantrum

2011-04-19T11:41:00.000-06:00

Tantrum Holy Tantrum! Yesterday was my first brush with the so called "terrible twos". On the way home from picking Emmett up I stopped to pick up a few things we needed to finish supper. Everything was going well, kids were happy well behaved, I found everything I needed and we were out of Sobey's in record time. We got to the car and the world stopped.

I usually put Emmett in his seat first but he had asked to "drive" so I let him play for a few minutes while I loaded the groceries and Kennedy into the car. Once I finished loading up I went to get him to put him in his seat and met a complete and utter melt-down. I've never witnessed him do anything like this, he was a different child.

It was an arch your back, kick, scream, cry and fight tantrum. I couldn't put him in his carseat because he was arching his back and I'm not strong enough to pin him in it while doing up the straps. I struggled with him for a few minutes then took him out, stepped back and had a talk with him. Explained that he could drive again when we got home, that to go anywhere he needed to be buckled up - he calmed down and we tried again - and melt down.

Step out of the car again - ask what he wanted, tried to distract him with groceries, promise to play/walk Wickett at home, play with the neighborhood kids - he calms down says ya and ok, so i try the car seat again - and yep, cue MAJOR meltdown.

By now Kennedy is crying because she's hungry and Emmett is freaking out so she's following, Brendan has called wondering where we are, I'm sweaty, hungry and losing my cool and poor, poor Emmett is exhausted and really upset. I calmed him down again and tried once more to get him is his seat - no go.

I gave in and called for back up. Brendan came and took Emmett. Whew. All in all, we were in the Sobey's parking lot for 30 min trying to get him into his seat. It was awful. I definitely felt like one those moms, you know the moms you kinda feel sorry for when you see their children freaking out. Yep that was me.

But we changed the situation; Luckily Brendan was home to come help because I have no idea what I would've done. I guess get out of the car and take everyone for a walk or something but oh my. Who was that child?

Emmett has always loved driving. I just hope this isn't an ongoing situation for us because if it is I"ll never be able to leave the house with him again. I've never not be able to calm him down and diffuse the situation. But we all survived and after a very long night of a whiny toddler, Mommy had some wine, Daddy had a beer and Emmett slept through the night.

Every one is happy and rested today!

Balancing It All

2011-04-18T12:14:00.000-06:00

I've always been told that going from one child to two is the hardest. I think I may agree. Now that I've had a few weeks of being the only parent of the two during the days I have to say it really is hard. For the most part we all do really well. Everyone is healthy and happy and fairly stress free but then we have these moments where both kids are crying and Brendan has just walked out the door and I've been up all night and the Keurig isn't working - those moments I wonder how I can do it.

But then Kennedy will give me a smile or Emmett will make me laugh and I can see the sun and see how I'll make it through the day and how my life is so much better with two to love.

The real trouble is balancing it all. Like all moms, I'd like nothing better than just to devote all my time to parenting but I have other commitments. Now that I'm finding my groove in parenting 2 children I'd like to start focusing on the other important things in my life : Jewelry business, Scrapbooking (so fun), Campaign Manager (provincial candidate) and maybe some housework (haha). The balance of life is always hard but hopefully with some redirection of focus and energy I'll find the balance I need.

Adding to the stress of new baby and change to 2 kids is the upcoming trial to settle my dad's estate. The estate saga is something I don't really mention here. It's really the one aspect of life I keep to myself on the blog. Long story short; 2006 dad got cancer, married his girlfriend (boo) 4 months later, 2007 passed away, 5 years later we are taking her to court because we can't come to an agreement of how the estate should be settled. So the first week of May will find me sitting in a courtroom day in and out hashing out the details and listening and talking about happy times and sad times.

Luckily I have an awesome family and tons of support. It's been dragging on for so long that I'm just happy to have this over with soon.

One Month Picture

2011-04-15T16:58:00.000-06:00

NKOTBSB New Single!

2011-04-14T08:02:00.000-06:00

LOVE THIS!!!! Sadly I won't be able to see them this summer because I'll be in the States while they're in Canada. OOh the irony! But I plan to fully enjoy all the great new music they'll be putting out this summer. Fall tour boys and I promise I won't miss it.

WW - Double Soother Duty

2011-04-13T08:22:00.000-06:00

One Month

2011-04-12T13:22:00.000-06:00

It's hard to believe that Kennedy hit the one month mark yesterday. This month has flown by and April is going by even faster.

Kennedy weighs about 9 lbs now (just a guess), sleeps most of the day and then has some awake time in the evening and before bedtime. She really only gets up once a night, which is awesome. As long as I feed her at 10 or 10:30pm she'll go down at about 11 and then sleep till 3 sometimes 4am. The only problem with that is when she gets up it takes me almost an hour to get her back down, which can be exhausting some nights.

I think she may have a touch of colic in her. Every night between 7 and 11 she has 2 really fussy hours. Nothing calms her down. She acts like she may be hungry but she won't latch on so we've tried letting her snack on a bottle - which sometimes helps and sometimes doesn't. But regardless, it's like clock work at the 2 hour fussy mark she'll get calm and look around or just fall asleep.

Her eyes are still a beautiful blue and she loves to look around during her awake time. She loves going for walks with Emmett and Wickett. I've been wearing her in a sling and it's just been the best experience for the both of us. She's so content in them that every time I take her out of them she cries and just seems unhappy. I'm loving babywearing more and more. Any suggestions on slings or wraps to try?

Emmett is just starting to realize that Kennedy is here to stay and he's starting to act out a bit. Whenever she cries he'll run to me and say "up". If I can't hold him because of a feeding he freaks out for a few minutes and then is fine. Poor guy loves her and wants to be near her all the time but doesn't understand that he can't always have the one on one attention he's used to.

It's been a learning curve for all of us and for the most part we're all doing fine. Kennedy is thriving and I'm amazed at how much babies change in a month. The day after I had her I was convinced that that was it, no more babies here. But now that I've healed (for the most part) and have seen the joy Emmett gets from holding his little sister and the love Brendan has for his family and have witnessed how my heart has grown from of all of this I think I could have one more....In a few years. When both kids are sleeping through the night I could definitely have one more baby.

She's big enough now that her little hands almost don't fit in the mittens of her newborn outfits

Kennedy has been such a blessing to us and has taught us all about love, family and patience.

Stretching is one of her favorite activites

Step Mom Connection..

2011-04-11T10:34:00.000-06:00

I do not have it! T has been in my life for 8 years and I've been an SMom for 5 of them and still my negative feelings towards her outweigh the positive.

I've done all the readings, the homework, the therapy and I am still waiting for that elusive step mom epiphany (miracle) that so many smoms talk about. That moment where you all of a sudden can parent the skids without feeling resentment, annoyance, and jealousy towards them.

T was here for a week to visit with us and meet Kennedy and I honestly had trouble making it through each day that week. I woke up feeling negative towards her and went to bed feeling annoyed. And the scariest part of that week is that Brendan's parents were here and took care of her most of the time. I have no idea how I'm going to make it through the month that she wants to spend with us in the summer. Give me strength and peace.

Now although I have a lot of negativity towards her, really it's negativity towards the situation. The past relationships, Brendan's way of parenting her, her other family's way of parenting her, on and on. If I look past all the bad things I think ( and it takes me a lot of soul searching to do this) I can see a beautiful young lady, a talented dancer, lively girl who enjoys life and most importantly an awesome big sister.

Step parenting is the hardest thing I've ever encountered. And knowing what i know now i can't say that i would ever do it over again.

Though even in the lowest of lows I can try and see the bright side and capture moments like this

Company Wrap Up

2011-04-08T16:40:00.000-06:00

Whew, 2 weeks later and our company is getting ready to leave Sunday morning. I'm not going to lie, there have definitely been some trying times these past two weeks. I must say that for the most part it has been truly awesome and wonderful to have such a full house. I get along great with my inlaws and they have been such a help and blessing to have with us while our family was under the weather and adjusting to a new baby.

Kennedy is a month old (as of yesterday) and I can't imagine life without her. Now that Emmett is on the mend and loving life again. He's going to miss having his grandparents around. We'll have another adjustment period next week when our house is empty again and it's just us and the kids.

I struggled a lot with having T around for the week. I'm not quite sure how I'll make it through the month of August. It was such a struggle that I had to seclude myself a lot to keep my negativity to myself. That along with illness, new baby and a lack of sleep is why my blog has been so ignored. But I'm feeling better and better each day, sleep has helped tremendously and my doc figured out that I have very low iron so the extra iron boosts I've been taking are finally working. I still have no idea how I'll make it through August and I need to work on a post about step moms because I need to work out how I feel and what I need to do to make it through the month.

Work gave me a bonus last week and even though I have way too many already I think I may spend part of it on this beautiful sling from Sakura Bloom

WW - Suntanning

2011-04-06T14:08:00.001-06:00

Survived

2011-04-04T11:35:00.000-06:00

whew, i think finally the house and family is on the mend. Emmett is on his second round of meds and I can only hope and pray that it works because if it doesn't then we are looking at maybe getting tubes in his ears. Oh how I hope it doesn't come to that.

T has gone home, Brendan and I are feeling better and Kennedy is thriving. I'm still waiting to have my house back and am a little done with having company but everyone is healthy (or on the way) and happy and I'm so grateful to have all this help for a few weeks.

I've started to work on some actual posts (birth story, step mom update...) and will get a few of those up this week. For now here are the kiddos